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[Idallas]: All aboard the SS fandom.

Hello, CSUB fandom friends.

It’s your host, Idallas.

Welcome back on board fandom friends.

Today’s episode is a little different.

With today’s guest, we will be sharing different fandom stories from our life and detail how the world of fandom has expanded us for us over the years.

Now today I’m with Shay.

All right, Shay.

So for us, we’re big, big, big, big fangirls.

We’ve been into fandom for literal years from childhood all the way up to this exact point.

I think that’s shaped us and made a pivotal part of who we are as human beings and all that grand joy stuff.

[Shay]: I totally agree.

I, um, I think the biggest part of how you and I define ourselves is within different fandoms and how we express those interests.

I completely agree.

Like, um, from childhood, I think big, big things that we grew up with would be like, uh, for example, like Disney Channel and Nickelodeon, uh, for you, I know it was the Jonas Brothers specifically within Disney Channel.

I was obsessed with the Jonas Brothers.

I tuned into the show.

I had their, like, DVD movie.

I was, like, just locked in.

Specifically Joe Jonas, I was head over heels.

I would go, do you remember seeing, like, the magazines at the stores, like, for children?

Yeah, the, uh, what is it, JO1, I think, and stuff like that, the teen magazines, like those types of things, which are, like, rest in peace.

I miss those so bad.

I miss them, but I used to beg my parents to buy me ones and only my mom bought them because she was a fangirl for stuff.

She was obsessed with, like, Elvis Presley, so she got it.

She, she understood.

And that’s how I got all my posters and it’s embarrassing, but, like, I put the posters on my wall and I would make out with them.

You know what, Moon?

If you weren’t doing that as a child, I don’t know what y’all were doing.

That was, like, an opening, an opening experience, an eye-opening experience for everybody.

Yeah.

And I think the Disney Channel and watching, like, Nickelodeon, those shows, being into, like, the Jonas Brothers, I don’t know if it’s the same for you, but for me, it was so, like, I was part of a fandom before I even realized what that meant.

For me, it was a little bit different only because I tended to gravitate towards more Nick shows and that’s solely based off of what I had access to at the time and, well, my parents are, well, being my parents, for everybody at home, I got Mexican parents, so having any type of joy is, it ain’t, it ain’t easy for us, those little Mexicans out there, especially, especially a young Dali at the time.

So while you got the teen magazines, I could only, I want this.

Go to the car.

Damn.

All right.

Yeah.

I was definitely, I was definitely spoiled as a, as a young kid with my mom because she, she got it.

She understood.

Yeah.

She understood.

She loved it.

There’s a difference between when parents understand and when they don’t, for sure.

But like, um, the transition from that, because I know we talked about Max Schneider and if for everybody at home who doesn’t know who that is, that’s Max, the artist.

Yeah.

So Max Schneider, a lot of people know him as Max today, but I found this man when he was still on Nickelodeon because he did How to Rock and How to Rock the show that was, like, not on air long enough.

But then he also did with Kiki Palmer, Rags to Riches, and I became obsessed with him.

I became obsessed with his music ability.

He actually went on tour with Victoria Justice and they did melody songs on YouTube.

It was phenomenal.

But at the time I was a fan, but I didn’t have a lot of access to the internet.

And when I did, I was not tech savvy.

I still, to this day, can barely operate a computer.

Girl, who can?

Tell me who can.

Unless you know computers like the back of your hand like that.

Who can, truly?

And I’m a geek and a little bit of a nerd, but not technology based.

And I don’t know for you, but one of the pivotal things for me that marked me as a fan is while just Googling Max Schneider, I found a website that was just based around him.

And it had different links to songs, MP3s uploaded.

It was like a blog for him.

Right.

And I would visit it every single day.

And that was the only way I knew how to interact.

But even then, I wasn’t clocking that I was like a fangirl or what a fandom was.

You didn’t know what it was, but you were a part of it already.

Yeah.

And so it’s just like finding niche communities and like online like that.

I was very fortunate in the fact that a lot of what I found when I was young, because this was before I was like 10 or 12, that every single thing that I found was like appropriate for my age.

Yeah, this is this was very much the time when tween and all of that type of stuff was going on.

So there was age appropriate content for us as children to get into.

You very much had somebody that was more in the realm of more in line for who you would look at or look up to, because we had a lot of teen pop stars.

We had a lot of teen people like Hannah Montana growing up.

So we had like they were obviously older than us, but they were close enough in age that we can idolize them safely, I feel.

I agree.

And I think back then, especially like in the late 2000 or early 2010s to late 2010s, there was a lot of places online for children to exist.

Yes.

So many things.

Pop Tropica.

Yeah.

Oh, my gosh.

I loved Pop Tropica, Club Penguin.

I don’t think I ever really was able to get on Club Penguin as much as I got on Pop Tropica.

Oh, I loved Pop Tropica or Emoshi Monsters.

Yes.

Oh, yes.

Yes, yes, yes, yes.

Even Build-A-Bear.

Yeah, I was on Build-A-Bear all the time because they had so many like fun flash games.

Were you ever on Stardoll?

I don’t know if you were ever on Stardoll like I was.

I was on Stardoll like so often.

I tried getting into Stardoll, but it just my interest.

I was really geeky.

I was like, anything that’s popular, miss me and poor little me.

I was like, I was on Stardoll and I was on a few other things like that just because I was like, you know, me, the self-proclaimed fashionista at this point.

So that was always up my alley.

So I totally get you.

Did you have fun with it, though?

Because I know there was so much freaking fun.

There was a there was a part where it was like paid content.

Oh, yeah, that was towards the end of the end.

Really, the end of like the end of Stardoll as it is.

Rest and pay Stardoll.

You are missed.

I missed you when you were free.

Hashtag, let’s bring it back.

Let’s bring it back.

Bring it back for adults, please.

Because honestly, Stardoll 2, by the end of it, had a lot more like like it had like they just used to have like brand partnerships and stuff like that.

But by the end, there was like a lot of like Gucci, Prada.

And I was like, how are people getting into this?

Who has the money for this?

I certainly don’t.

Exactly.

But oh, those those things, they were just so much fun.

And they were safe for us.

They were communities that we didn’t know what it really meant, but we were still there and enjoying and thriving off of them.

I think it was really one thing about us being like fangirls back when we were like children.

It was it’s so interesting thinking about it now because the Internet was figuring itself out.

While we were figuring out how to use it and explore our spaces, we grew up as the Internet was expanding.

Yes.

And I think it was so pivotal.

My Internet access, not only like at all, but back then what was available to me as like a little fangirl.

I I know not to be like one of those people that’s like the rose tinted glasses for nostalgic or nostalgia.

But I think back to like how I would like my relationship with the Internet and how it progressed with like what I was into as I grew up.

And I want to change it.

I really like the way I interacted.

Yeah, because I feel like we had just the perfect amount where we were outside, but we were still growing with the Internet.

The Internet was still in its first like iterations, really becoming something that every household was able to start having in their thing, because at the time it was expensive.

But nowadays, obviously, you have unlimited access to that, whether or not you’re looking at it, whichever way you want to.

But in that point in time, especially with us growing up like that, it really was that like sweet spot of, yeah, we were offline just as much as we were online.

Yeah.

And I think a lot of people were turning to the Internet when we were growing up as like kids to tweens to teens as a way to find community based on what you like.

Yep.

Instead of just always like enjoying it on your own is like building those communities.

I know for both of us, we also shared a big love for big time.

Oh, yes.

Big Time Rush was like the Jonas Brothers were like my intro to like boy bands.

But yeah, Big Time Rush, right.

When I think that I could have left that all behind in like my quote unquote childhood, the tween in me grasps to Kendall Smith of Big Time Rush.

And I like watched everything he ever did.

I was obsessed with their songs.

I used to like out of my notebook, like write posters of I heart Kendall.

And when they were performing a live on the news, I’d like hold it up in my living room.

I totally feel you.

Oh, my God, because that was around like that to getting and transitioning into my teen years is when I really started getting into like Mariana’s Trench and everything like that.

So I feel you exactly on the writing stuff out, making your own posters that no one would see but it’s just like you and the TV.

Yes, we would share that.

My TV would have this understanding.

We’d be locked in together.

But that around that time, too, besides just getting into like Big Time Rush, too, we were also getting into like very pivotal stuff for us even now, which would be like the Avatar, The Last Airbender.

Yeah, Avatar, The Last Airbender was and I’m pretty sure this is like the pipeline for most people, but it was my gateway into anime.

Yeah.

And I just remember because it was on a like Teen Nick or Nick at Night or it was on regular Nick, too.

Yeah, it was on regular.

That’s how I got into it, because it was on regular Nick.

And then it started transitioning a little bit more just as it got heavier in its content, I feel.

Yeah.

And I’m still a huge part of like the Avatar, The Last Airbender fandom.

I’m waiting for that that movie that’s going to supposed to come out.

Yeah.

I’ve been reading some of the books.

I still think it’s just one of the most.

I still launch my appa plushie across my room daily.

Can confirm.

The world in that was so beautiful.

And I think it was the first time in a long time when I was really young, it was like the world I wanted to go to.

I’d always like ask my friends, like, are you a waterbender?

Are you a firebender?

I it was one of the things I can’t answer that question.

No, still to this day, I’ll like stare at a cup and I’m like, what if I can move you?

What if?

Literally, the what if.

But in that too, that whimsy that we share for like different fictional media like that as well, that transitions into our shared love.

I know it’s a little bit different for you in terms of like, because I grew up with Harry Potter, but we both shared the love for Percy Jackson.

Yes.

Percy Jackson was a book I originally read through a teacher.

They were reading it like to the class.

And from there, I continued to just like read it.

And it was one of the first series of books that I got me into reading.

And I was so in love with the characters.

And I was a tween when I read it.

But Percy Jackson was around my age and to continue the whole series as I grew up, it was just amazing.

It was something I carried into my like teenagehood, like I read them while I was in high school.

Yeah, same, because I mean, he was essentially the way Rick did it was he had Percy growing up with us at that time, which is why I hold such a love and deep appreciation for it, because a lot of the stuff, like a lot of the content, like there are LGBTQ plus characters in the book.

And unlike Harry Potter, which again, I have my feelings on the author, but we shall not say that now.

Where we seen the differences between that where Harry Potter very much turned.

Well, Harry Potter was a little bit before us in our period, just a little bit.

Like it was towards the end where it finally finished up.

So I was still popular.

Oh, yeah, it’s still popular to this day.

But it very much had the differences like the distinguishes between Harry Potter and the Percy Jackson fandom were things like LGBTQ plus, like color representation, because we got we got to see that with like even the Hunger Games, like just color representation and period.

And for me growing up and starting to learn these things in a safe way was such an interesting and like eye opening thing, I feel.

I did love when I was younger how like Rick Rordon went about the series.

But I think the main thing that really drew me to Percy Jackson and I’m sure drew other people, and it’s probably what actually drew you to Harry Potter, was the fact that I saw myself in the main character.

It was someone that didn’t quite fit in.

Yeah.

And even after kind of figuring out where they belong, it wasn’t perfect and it was like pivotal for us as children, I think, to have some kind of media that was made for us.

So it was appropriate that let us feel like we belong, own our uniqueness without shame, open our community.

Like because Percy Jackson, his best friend, Grover, is someone that he, yes, he was made to protect Percy Jackson, but they actually were best friends and they actually protected each other.

And Annabeth was also like through thick and thin.

Yeah.

And it was amazing to see those friendships because it gave me hope as like a little kid who didn’t really fit in, who got bullied.

I saw myself in Percy Jackson at being different and wanting like more from life because I was like, oh, it’d be amazing to have a goddess or god as one of my parents and be a demigod.

And I’m sure you felt that way about getting a letter to go to Hogwarts.

I it’s funny because being in both specific fandoms, I got to get the cusp of both of like, I want a god as my parent.

And then I’m like, but I want my letter still too.

And it’s just like, how is that supposed to work?

I don’t know, but I’m going to make it work.

It’s fiction.

I’m going to make it work.

Exactly.

And I think those books for kids, like going into teens and tweens and everything like that, it really helped us like not just have to like be a child and like grow up, but it gave us the opportunity to think about fictional worlds and believe and have fun and like the whimsy that you were talking about because it can carry that because I ever when I stopped reading the books, I didn’t stop thinking about it.

And it would bring me comfort that there was like a like the world was bigger than what it actually is.

I totally agree with that.

And I also sorry about my phone.

It’s OK. For us, I know, too, that that started to carry over into actually anime.

So anime was a big one for us, too, especially when we actually met because we met, well, how long ago was it at this point?

Girl, we’re old anyway.

We really are.

Good lord.

Death.

See, my old age is catching up to me.

You’re younger than me.

Shut up.

Oh, shush.

By how many months?

Calm down.

We’re fine.

What?

Do you want me to start calling you old lady?

I love you.

Shush yourself.

OK, next question.

Anyway, so our our introduction to anime and what a lot of people what people won’t hear me shut up about, like if you know me outside of this podcast, you know, I do not shut up about this anime because it was the very big, pivotal anime and was my first one.

Soul Eater.

I love Soul Eater.

Was it appropriate?

No.

But did I still love it?

I do.

I still love it.

Hell yeah.

Soul Eater.

It was also one of my first real animes that I watched start to finish.

Right.

And I do think it has like the same idea that like we were talking about Percy Jackson and Harry Potter of like the main characters weren’t perfect.

They were kind of unique and anime at that time.

I was getting into it slowly.

And I really liked the idea of like it was one of the first times I remember like really talking about characters outside of just what was happening in the anime and like coming up with headcanons.

Oh, my God.

Wow.

We were like at recess at middle school.

Literally making making our own fan fiction.

I won’t get into those stories because those stories are kept between us too.

But yeah, no.

Fan fiction.

Fan fiction.

So fan fiction was something I briefly started getting into when I was still in Disney Channel because I was huge into kicking it.

Oh, hell yeah.

And I would read fan fiction on fanfiction.net of Jack and Kim.

And at first I would only read it.

And that continued in middle school.

I read a lot of fan fiction in middle school.

A lot of it was about anime.

But it was like talking with like the friends that we made in that friend group.

Oh, yeah.

And like the headcanons would be like Blackstar would do this and Soul would do this.

And that like got me into the mindset of like not just being a reader of fan fiction.

Yeah.

But also here’s a really interesting thing.

Anime was the first time in my whole life where I felt some kind of rejection with the anime kids.

There was a lot of people at the time when we were younger who were more into anime or more into niche things or rolling around anime.

And it was the first time I felt judged for knowing, but not knowing enough.

Ah, yeah.

I can totally get what you mean.

It’s like this, um, it was like clicky in a way for me.

I understand that a lot, especially with high school, just because of the way that dynamics in my high school worked.

But it’s like you get judged so hard, like even to this day.

Like I know I know this is like a very topic for people.

But like the idea of girls going into, quote unquote, guy spaces or guy fandoms and being judged in the way of you don’t know this.

Now, you don’t know that if you don’t like this, this is not your favorite thing.

You’re not a real fan.

The misogyny, mishot, how do you say that?

Misogyny.

Misogyny was really, really bad back then.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Literally, especially when you were getting into anime and stuff like that.

And it was weird because we got into anime like in the early 2000s.

It was like 2013, 2014.

But anime at that time was not popular.

You were a weird kid for watching anime, which was why I was so interesting to have the reaction of talking to another anime fan and having them have that clicky, well, you’re not a real fan.

You haven’t watched this.

What about this?

Yeah.

Or you watch it in dubbed, not subbed.

Also, I remember like you’re bringing up flashbacks here, girl.

Oh, my God.

So Angel Beats, Angel Beats, I have such an interesting relationship with because everybody was talking about it.

But I was just like, how am I supposed to watch this?

I barely was able to watch the later.

And that’s because it was on Netflix, bro.

And Netflix was like, and it’s barely coming up into things at the time.

At the time, I didn’t have a lot of Internet access.

Yeah.

And even when I did, I didn’t know where to look because I was really bad.

I would click on the websites that would give the computer viruses.

Yeah, I was tech savvy.

See, I have a story on that, too.

And that’s when I first got my like very, very first laptop and things like that.

It was very much just run in the middle, just basic stuff.

And I started trying to branch out a solider for the people at home.

This is a content warning.

Just know that I’m talking about some wild stuff.

Basically, I clicked on this thing called High School DxD, and I still haven’t watched it.

This is how bad it’s got me for life, but I clicked on High School DxD, and very much I was introduced to the world of Ecchi at a time and point where I was not ready to be introduced to any of that.

So I was very much just like, oh, I literally screamed, slammed my laptop, close.

I don’t know how I didn’t break that, but go figure.

Okay, you reminded me that my freshman year of high school, I was searching for a different anime, but I stumbled upon Kill la Kill.

Oh my god, I love Kill la Kill, even though it’s, well, it’s commentary.

It was on a website that would constantly like break down, but I, for some reason, I don’t know how I did it, but I like saved the little like icon to my dad’s laptop because he had like a Toshiba or whatever laptop, but it was, you know, starting to really slow down, and I could not access anything but Kill la Kill, and it was not the anime I wanted to watch, but because it was the only anime I had access to, I watched it.

Yeah.

And I remember that one of the first times I had ever brought it up, I got like shamed for the amount of fans there is.

Yeah, but the fan service was literally a meta commentary on it.

It really was.

And people didn’t understand that at the time, and now it’s praised for it, but it’s just like, having, saying that you were a Kill la Kill fan back in the things, it was like sticking the freaking hellhounds on you.

Yeah, it was not, and it’s still an anime that I hold very dear to my heart, but it was one I didn’t talk about for so long, because I really did, those situations where I got judged by anime fans, it really kind of kept me from getting super into anime, which is why I think in high school I ended up getting into so many other fandoms, such as Degrassi, which was, for those of who don’t know, it’s a Canadian high school drama, and the school itself is called Degrassi, and it’s set at school, and the students are coming and going, like they’ll transfer in, and it’s following their daily life, and one reason I think I really ended up gravitating towards Degrassi was I found it at such a young point in my life, where I was really starting to learn about the world, and the thing about Degrassi is they never shied away from real plotlines and real stories about what teenagers go through, and it was- The hard stuff.

Yeah, the hard stuff.

It introduced me to so many topics, from, they had a character that was transgender, they would have storylines about a parent who’s addicted, they would have storylines about students who were addicted, it would really just range, and I loved how they carried it, because while they were never afraid to go deep, they didn’t make it too dark, they really kept their audience in mind, and it taught me so much about the world, and it was not a fandom that a lot of other people knew about, because I was one of the lucky kids who I had, like, team Nick, because I had the more channels, and it was a fandom that I carried all the way until almost COVID, because I just followed the characters, and I saw myself in them, especially as a queer girl who, you know, didn’t feel shame for her queerness, but didn’t have many people around me that weren’t just allies, and kind of seeing, like, the stories of people going through different things, they covered bipolar, they covered anxiety, they covered race, like, different racism, because it comes in different forms, and it affects everyone differently, whether you realize it or not.

Yep, and that was a huge show that I got into when I feel like anime kind of, no offense, but kind of pushed me off.

I was still interested in anime as the media, but I didn’t care for the fans.

Right, I totally get that, and that is a good point to make, because fandom can be good, and it can be bad.

We have just as many bad stories as we do good stories.

For us, too, growing up, like, we transitioned into things like video games.

For us, I know it was like Jacksepticeye for you, Markiplier for me, PewDiePie was a big one as well, you with The Last of Us, me with FNAF.

Yeah, no, it’s the deep cut of Jacksepticeye, because once I started watching him, really, because I was introduced to PewDiePie, of course, first.

Right, right.

He was the biggest one, and he made a lot of more, like, funny haha content, but Jacksepticeye was the first real YouTuber I remember, like, like, gravitating and, like, latching myself to, and I kid you not, since probably 2015, I have not missed a Jacksepticeye, like, upload.

I’m tuned in, I’m still a huge fan, and I love his community.

There’s something about people like Mark and Jack, or Markiplier and Jacksepticeye, that their community, while there is, of course, going to be the stragglers, their community is so based, so sweet, and so based on passion and love.

Love for the game.

Yeah, love for the game, but also, Jack and Mark are some of the best people, celebrity-wise, that has come from YouTube, and the fact that they’re genuine, they still don’t really understand their status of being as popular as they are, because they never set out to make a career out of it, they just got lucky, but they never have lost their humbleness.

Yep, and I think that really translates over to, like, the big projects that they’re getting involved in, like, Jack’s, a lot of people’s reception to Jacksepticeye when he came on Poppy Playtime, and the love for that.

Markiplier’s new film, Iron Lung, so many people just, they don’t realize just how much impact they have, or, and they still don’t, like, I know both of them at points in time will, like, in Markiplier’s case, break down on camera.

Yeah.

Professing, like, things.

Jacksepticeye, this is kind of branching away from the teenage stuff, but Jacksepticeye recently, last year, in 2025, he did, and I was telling you about it, he did a game jam, where for those of you who don’t know, a game jam is where they will list the parameters of, like, the ideas of a game, and then you have a team of people, it’s self-made, you make a game, so you get developers, you get sound people, you get someone who 3D art, you get someone who programs the game, and they work together to make it, and Jacksepticeye did one in October, I think it was, like, a Jacksepticeye jam or something, and he was really blown away by how many games got submitted, because, you know, he did think that there was going to be a lot, but fans really blew it out of proportion.

Right.

And he was so happy, because he was like, oh, I want to see, like, I play games, I want to see what my fans can create, you know, and I thought it was a beautiful way for him to, like, continue to change the way of how fans interact, and it was just so phenomenal.

He had so much fun looking into the games, and it was so cool to see him, in a media that he plays and he’s respected, respect the fans who respect him.

Exactly, and I think that that, too, like, when we were teens looking at, like, because YouTube very much was a kind of, like, ourself type of thing, versus nowadays, where it’s now, it’s grown into the community that we all kind of get involved with in little ways here and there, but you and I really bonded over Supernatural, and that’s recently, more recently, come to an end and things like that, even though I don’t consider that ending an end, but I digress.

Yeah, Supernatural, man.

Freaking love Supernatural, but that’s how we really started bonding, because I yanked you into that.

We had talked a little bit about, and we had tried talking about video games, because I was, like, a Last of Us head and a Telltale The Walking Dead head, and, like, we were also into The Walking Dead, but because that kind of fell off, not fell off, but it was harder to, like, find where to watch it, Supernatural was something that was a little bit more accessible, because CW was very much one of those channels that a lot of people had access to.

Mm-hmm, and I agree, and the only reason I started watching it was I had a cert, uh, one summer where I was, like, technically bedridden, because I had surgery on my shoulder, and I literally was told to not do anything strenuous for six weeks.

Right.

And I was like, I’m not going to just sit here with nothing, so I asked my dad if he could buy me, like, the first couple seasons on DVD, and I just binge-watched it, and I think I got up to, like, season eight or nine at the end of it, and then, um, I remember I would message you and that our love for Dean and Sam Winchester, and their, their stories, and I mean, of course, you know, it started to change as we got older.

You’re right.

But it was so pivotal, especially the stories they were telling once again, you know.

We can start, we were starting to relate to them, like, as much as it was a fictional world, it was also, like, the things that they were going through, you take the fiction, like, the fictional content really out of it, and you’re left with something that we could relate to, like, a lot of the heavy topics we could relate to in certain ways.

I agree, and I know it was something that we didn’t really touch upon in middle school, but middle school talking about characters was something we started to get into, like, the, the realm of role-playing.

Yep, creating characters and things like that.

Yeah, and Supernatural really, I think, revamped that for us.

Yes.

And we would not, we weren’t doing, like, just, like, we, it was, we would create whole different stories, and arcs, and character development.

It was, it was full-fledged out stories.

I look at role-playing, especially between us, as more of two people writing an actual, like, literate story instead of.

Yeah, that’s how I explain role-playing, and for the people at home, literally, that is how I’m going to explain it is role-playing is, you can have it with multiple people, but really, it’s creating a story between other people.

There’s the misconception that role-play is completely sexual.

It’s not.

It is what you make it to be.

It’s very much, you make your characters, you make the world you want to be in, whether that be actually throwing in different fictional things, or, like, different fandoms that we have.

Like, you, 21 pilots, me, Bring Me the Horizon, different things.

And, yeah, I hate the notion that it’s, like, completely and utterly just, like, icky and gross.

Yeah, it’s so weird for people, like, they don’t understand it.

If you don’t understand it.

I agree, and it’s so interesting, because if people know me, there’s only one thing happening in my role-play, angst.

Someone’s going through some kind of emotional turmoil.

You’re making me cry on the down low right here.

For those of you who don’t know, every single time, I’m like, if a character’s happy, I’m like, how can I make them actually depressed and go through the worst things imaginable?

And I’m in the back trying to strangle you.

Yeah, because I’m so in love with, like, resilience.

Yeah, yeah, because, I mean, it’s a big part of who we are.

Like, we’ve been through shit, which we don’t really have to get into that, because that’s a whole other topic for another day.

Yeah.

But all of these things play out into the media that we were seeing, like, the Hunger Games for us, too.

Like, you, for you, specifically, 80s books and films.

Yeah, 80s books and films.

There’s so many.

The Outsiders was the kickoff for the 80s.

And that’s what I got thrown into as well.

And it was one of the first times that I really remember just being, like, emotionally invested in the story.

And back then, 80s was so different.

It was a different landscape.

It was a different society.

And there was, in the Outsiders, there’s really big on the Socs versus the Greasers.

Yep.

And it just stuck out to me because it was like a group of people, like, banding together, like the found family trope, which I still love to this day.

It’s such a good trope.

I love it.

Yeah, so that really, all of these things, and we’re not saying these stories for any, like, this is all coming back to how it shaped us today.

Because today, we still are into fandoms.

We’re still into very big things.

Like, I know, last episode, we talked about it, but we’re also big fans of it, Shea and myself.

K-pop really shaped the way we roll nowadays within fandoms, because K-pop is such a different fandom.

Yeah, I do have to backtrack slightly just to address the idea of 21 Pilots.

Because 21 Pilots, while Geminis Brothers and Big Time Rush were, like, my childhood boy bands, 21 Pilots was a group I found when I was really, really struggling.

I found them during the darkest time of my life, and their music was an outlet for me, and it got me through.

That was the same with Bruneth Harrison for me.

Yeah, and it was so, I was, that’s probably the biggest, the first time that I remember being like, oh, I am a clique member.

Yeah, attached to a fandom in and of itself.

And interacting and, like, freaking out over music videos and lore and that kind of thing.

But the reason I had to backtrack to 21 Pilots is because- It plays into K-pop.

It does.

I don’t think I would have been able to enjoy K-pop the way I did if it wasn’t for the fact that 21 Pilots healed me.

Right.

So by the time I got into K-pop, which was 2018 for me, which was, I was 18, 19, or 17, 18.

I got into it a little bit before you, but we were still at the cusp of becoming adults when we were in K-pop.

And K-pop for me was fun, especially compared to a lot of the music that I was listening to when I was like in high school.

Because high school, I was depressed and anxious and struggling with my self-worth.

And by the time I found K-pop, I had kind of come to terms with who I was and I was happy.

And so K-pop was this explosion of fun.

I mean, K-pop, it’s poppy music, it’s dancey, it’s amazing.

And my first group, just like you, or my intro was like, well, I can’t say that for you, but BTS was pivotal.

I got into them right during the Love Yourself era.

Yeah, for me, it was Boyfriend who threw me into it, but BTS is just as much there because I love BTS just as much.

But yeah, for us, it really changed perspective on fandom culture because fandom culture with K-pop, like I said last episode, was really, really different versus like just normal Western fandom stuff.

But it translated into different things because from there, we rolled off into like Asian dramas, Love in Deep Space, J-pop, and J-rock more recently.

And it’s so funny, all those things that you have brought up are all things that I either got introduced from you, who taught me about K-pop and is the reason why I’m a huge multi-stan, or from other K-pop fans I ever find it in our own community.

Because I learned about Love in Deep Space while on CSUB campus from friends that I made from going to in-person K-pop cups sleeves.

And yeah, and it’s the same thing about the dramas.

I didn’t know K-dramas existed until I was talking to other K-pop fans and they were like, so and so was on this drama, you need to watch this.

And K-pop is just so much fun.

Granted, it has its ups and downs as well.

As many groups as we stand.

Especially, yeah.

Again, fandom, again, for friends who don’t understand this, I’m gonna say it probably every episode, fandom is a loving and beautiful space, but just as much as it can be, there are people of all walks of life, and there are people with lots of different opinions and everything.

So you do have that dark side to fandom, so you do have a lot of the dark stuff that does come into play.

And while I don’t get into that right now, especially in this episode, because I just don’t feel the need to highlight that, it is important to remember that just because you encounter something bad within a fandom, don’t let that taint the love that you have for something.

Don’t associate that love that you originally had for something with that bad thing.

I completely agree.

I think the biggest thing that you and I can probably agree on in being an adult while being a fangirl, because we’re never gonna lose that identity of ourselves, I don’t know who I am without my interests, just as you don’t.

It’s one of those things where, as we get older, we have to understand what it is we love about our fandoms, why we love it, and engage with it in that way.

As an adult, we have to kind of schedule our time to enjoy and have fun, and through your fandom spaces, it’s putting boundaries or understanding what it is you enjoy, and making sure that you’re having fun with that.

Because like K-pop, for example, if it’s staying up at 2am for music video drops, or yapping with your best friend, or being online about it, you can do that, but there’s no hate to someone who only wants to listen to the music, and don’t want to engage with fans online.

Yeah, you can be by yourself in a fandom, and that’s okay too.

It’s whatever you want to do, it’s whatever you make it.

Sometimes it really is nice to just have that thing to yourself, and build that love without always having to express it, like you can keep it.

And one of the bigger fandoms that really taught me that was actually Smosh.

When Anthony came back to Smosh, it reminded me that just because I’m an adult, and I have to grow up, and my responsibilities are going to get more heavy, I don’t have to give up who I am.

I can have fun, I can be silly, I need to be mindful about when and where, but I don’t have to give up collecting Pokemon cards.

Literally.

Or giggling over a music video at 3am, or going to a concert and dressing up, and getting excited.

You’re allowed to have that whimsy, and you’re allowed to have that joy, and people need to understand that.

Because as much as people are telling you, you need to grow up, you need to get serious, quote unquote, it doesn’t mean you still don’t have to have some type of joy in your life.

There’s a misconception that people have with fandoms and things like that, that this is for children.

It’s not.

It’s really not.

You can have so many things.

So many adults are in fandom spaces, and creating gorgeous things.

How do you think you get cosplay?

How do you think you get wonderful works of fiction that turn into full-fledged books?

Yeah, it’s, I mean, I think a lot of people want to dog fandoms, but at the end of the day, how many Wattpad stories have been turned into movies?

Literally.

Maybe they’re not exactly the best in the world.

But they still have branched off into their own.

And if you think about things like FNAF, if the fandom wasn’t as big as it was, the movies never would have happened.

And say what you want about them.

It’s one of the things where it’s like, there was a love, there was a push.

The FNAF fans got that movie.

Whether or not they loved it, different story.

But their love and their passion, and continuing to explore the lore, and hype up games.

Supporting the development of the games.

Again, a big part that people don’t understand is that fandoms are very much adult, because the adults are the ones who are putting money down into the games.

Exactly.

And I do want to go back to The Last of Us, because The Last of Us was so popular, and so well supported, that it’s actually why we got The Last of Us Part 2.

And Part 2 became so popular that we actually got the show.

And I have my own qualms with the show.

I’m not going to get into it here, but it’s one of those things where if you’re in love with something, express it, feel it, support it, interact with it.

Maybe you don’t want it to be part of your identity.

You don’t have to, but don’t diminish your love for things based on anyone else’s belief.

If you are having fun, if you are enjoying, keep going.

Don’t let anyone stop you.

You’re not doing any harm.

You can be 26 and giggle at fanfictions.

You can be 50 and giggle at fanfiction.

You can be any age, as long as it brings you joy.

I will be pulling up concerts in a wheelchair.

Literally, me and you will be in our shared wheelchair.

Exactly.

We’ll just be, like, cuddled up next to each other, sharing a blanket.

Literally.

And with that, honestly, I think that’s the biggest message I wanted to send with today’s episode.

And I want to thank you for, obviously, joining me on today’s show and rehashing these things that we’ve talked about.

Because obviously, if you couldn’t tell audience at home, we are besties.

This is my Goyle right here.

And we talk about a lot of things, and we have shared a lot of things along the time with one another.

And again, we want to reiterate that fandoms, no matter where and when people get into them, can sometimes shape more than just their emotions.

It can, in our case, especially shape our lives.

I hope everyone out there can find something they love.

And till next time, this has been your host, Ideles.

I hope to see you set sail with us again.

Thank you again, Shea, for joining us.

Thank you for having me.

All right, now I got to go to Jay.

He thought I couldn’t do it.

Jay, if you’re hearing this later, he thought I couldn’t do it.

Oh, wow.

It was almost exact.

It’s like an hour.

I’m telling you.

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