I had the privilege of seeing “The Longest Ride” with fellow senior columnist, Shelby Parker, who undoubtedly is taking this review seriously.
While on the surface, this film is about a brave bull named Rango and the facing off against a stubborn professional bullrider. A closer look reveals that the latest Nicholas Sparks film adaptation contains deep emotional themes.
Sophia, a human female, conveniently sums them up on her first date with fellow human, a male cowboy named Luke. “Love, anger, passion, sadness, history…”
Like most of Sparks’ novel-films, there are two attractive white people in love with each other. Their story is paralleled with a wise old man’s love story, which ultimately serves as the final lesson the youngins have to learn in order to be happy. It’s kind of like beating the final boss in a video game, if the objective is to find love instead of unlocking some sweet extra levels and awesome weapons.
The name of the film most likely refers to the lasting power of love. Or, it could refer to the shower sex scene. An unexpected minute of sexy screentime feels like an hour when you’re sitting next to your friend, with whom you’ve never seen such a film.
Symbolism in the film was so in-your-face it distracted from the highly-predictable storyline. For example; Ruth and Ira’s art collection was a symbol of their love for each other, remaining intact after their deaths in the hands of their young counterparts. The thing that I disliked most about this film is that it was a two-hour reminder that there are guys who are stronger and more handsome than me.
There were two redeeming qualities to the film: the scenery and the bull riding. The natural beauty of the North Carolina wilderness was a brilliant breath of fresh air as I drowned in thematic undertones so heavy they’re as obvious as the overture.
I’ve seen two more Nicholas Sparks films than anyone with my palate of entertainment should see. For something you should see, check out the video of Shelby and I previewing “The Longest Ride” on our way to see it.

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